old google doodles...

miss lily's... she's real good.

So odd...
yesterday, I was meeting up with Beks who loves this place called Miss Lilys. So seeing as how I passed this place before and it has a cool vibe (and was utterly crowded the few times I have  passed) we made a reservation and had some good food, good chat and laughs. (I miss hanging out with Beks!) There were some decent looking Black Men (so we agreed next time to sit in the back of the place where apparently it is jumping) Oh check this review:
http://dinersjournal.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/09/27/reviewing-coppelia-reviewing-miss-lilys/

to the day one year later, it is still garnering great reviews and I can safely say the jerk chicken was great and the festival was *almost* perfect (just a little bit more sweetness would have rocked my world). Speaking of rocking of the worlds... I am still on that search. hopefully when i go on my vacation I can be all how Stella got her groove back minus the death of my bff and ultimately homosexual husband.

cheers!

coffee thought...

rainy day blues today. but it is friday. I think I need a BOLD cup of coffee.

(and what is this they are building that is going to interrupt my crappy view?)

that's all...

Shoes...yay

I found the ever elusive shoes! Whoo hoo-- these are going to the wedding in St. Thomas with me...
It saves me from purchasing these...

 

and the thriftyness continues...

coffee thought...horoscope

Gemini Horoscope for September 27, 2012

When you have an intellectual discussion today (and you most certainly will), try to see things from the other person's perspective. Be more compassionate about where they are coming from and what they have been dealing with. They could be coming from a very emotional perspective and not using logic to their advantage. You are confident enough in your point of view to not have to browbeat or be dogmatic. Go for a softer, gentler communication style today.

...compassionate, emotional, softer... ok.

coffee thought...

What not...What if...What is...What now?

Those questions are in my head as I am contemplating this coffee here. I think I thinks too much sometimes and the actions are calculated and thought out and the outcome/ reaction to said thinking thoughts is planned. Kind of like looking in the mirror and practicing your surprised face - gasp- and perfecting it.
But it never turns out that way. Most times it turns into the ugly cry.

that's all...

weekend manicure

doing my manicure on the cheap considering i have a plethora of nail polish and an abundance of time.

(in reality this is procrastination at its best as I was supposed to be organizing my home and letting go of some items of clothing...somethings went--- more on that laters)
 *colors are lisi nail polish (singularity) and wet & wild white with sephora traffic stopper copper on top.

coffee thought...

Coffee thought

Oh you know that it's over.

Summer-

you were exiting here now

passing me by.

Letting go of the long days

that we once were.

Fall

Falling into you

Change of color

Mix of temperatures

Welcome.

Occupy... something.

  

1 yr ago today (9/17) "occupy wall street" decided to occupy zucotti park in NYC. I sorta understand the premise of the actions of the occupiers and what they/ we are trying to accomplish (I say we because we are all in this struggle however I never occupied the wall street per se)
I (along with 2 coworkers) decided to occupy another co-workers play-- showing support for the actress and all. CW did a great job and really shined!
Anywho all this to say...pick your poison..

Sense-less

Touch...

One of the six senses that most of us have developed and use... [yes I said six senses as some of us have developed a keen observation and use of the sixth sense - not in the "I see dead people way" but in the listening to your mind- precognition, recognition and intuition]. Some haven't developed that sixth sense yet- it's OK not everyone will. I will say it is a handy dandy tool to use in the ever-evolving tool box of life—I was saying something poignant here----- Touch.

Keep in mind I am constructing this in the most consensual, legal, allowed and wanted way- and am in NO WAY discussing inappropriate forms. Just had to state that but is should be obvious.

Yes, touch is one of the most vital senses because of the depth it (touch) involves. It involves you (obviously) and 'the object of desire' or ‘object of desired touch’.
Vague? Not really.
Sexual? Not really {well not really not without innuendo either}
Simple? This may be simple- as I use this touch screen of the iPhone to record these words here. Touching specific parts of this app phone will create the wondrous words I have written err typed.
You get the point.
There is like actual touch itself – like to touch oneself [mind our the gutter people!] Like when you correct your hair or scratch an itch- (itch a scratch?)…
Either way there is that. It is important – each one of these actions as it is necessary in your day.  Then there is the utmost vital touch of one human being to another- a helping hand or a lift.  A generous hug.  A miraculous joining of two.  Touching. Exploring. Feeling.  Those touches are needed, wanted, pivotal, good and great all in one.  Those touches excite, ignite and invigorate all other senses to numerous possibilities, and making you aware of

FEELING.

Yup, with touch goes feelings and the feelings that come along with touch. Visceral feelings of hot, cold, warm, wet. Affecting feelings of hurt, pain, happy, love, and satisfaction.
I maintain you can’t have one (touch) without the other (feelings); you cannot touch something and not feel. To be all literal, literally think about this in life- we touch/impact/ impart ourselves on people in may different ways, with our family and friends on deep, deeper levels and also with random strangers on the train hopefully not so deep levels- skeevy dudes back away from me please.  If you do not touch someone with your actions or your words or your being- then what impact are you (truly) having on this world?  What feelings are you bringing to this interaction?  If you do not have physical intimacy with someone (not sexual) but physical (like a hug, or a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold) how does that shape who you are and the amount of intimacy you are able to provide?  I know there are some studies out there that state holding, cuddling, and physical contact with babies helps soothe the baby thus making baby cry less, and ultimately helps them develop their own self-soothing techniques.  Interesting.  I know I have heard somewhere that this also forms attachment (ergo this is sometimes depicted on TV and film- admittedly not the most reliable sources of explanation- where adoptive mothers can not and do not hold the infant they will give up for fear of attachment and bond).

Touch is real. Thanks.

I was thinking about that having not been touched lately (in the physical way- gutter folks come back to the convo & rejoice). It is something that I have learned to live with, the non-physical human contact my life takes every day. Is that normal (a common question asked by myself to myself for myself). Is this something that I should be used to?<-- seriously I am waiting for the answers to this one.  How about a hug? Nope, I can not hug ____. (<---Seriously. It is too much. The emotions and feeling are too much in a G-D damned hug. Deep.)
Now babies & small children's, I can love, cuddle, hold, swaddle, and protect. I will quickly hold their hand, pick them up, make them feel loved and protected. That is something I know I am good at. [go with what you know, right? I know I nurture others.]  But back to what I don’t know [admittedly a lot].  I don’t know why I can maintain (and I do maintain) that there is no inkling of feeling for ___ but then when touched by him it is unbearable. That is SO NOT NORMAL. (My diagnosis, and considering I am the expert, right?)
What is a girl to do?
How do I seek out touch & feeling with out inviting touchy-feelings to happen?  I feel like a kid trying to walk- grabbing on to anything in my way trying to maintain balance and recognizing the thing in the palm of my hand only long enough to move me on to the next place of interest.
Anywho all that to say Touch is vital. Touch is important. Touch is necessary.
Remember that. and try not to touch me in the morning.

coffee thought...

my throat hurts.. 
I think I will have some tea today.
thinking about fall allergies...
considering I have allergies all damned year long,
am I just an allergic person?
is it my environment that is slowly draining my sinus'
and causing my eyes to water
and my skin to be parched?
is it just that time of year?
is it all of the above...
and I am just that sensitive?

that's all...

Guns in the subway

Gun

Honored
Celebrated
Vindicated
Compensated

9/11

coffee thought...

let's start with the horoscope:

Gemini Horoscope for September 11, 2012

Money issues weigh heavily on your mind right now, although there's no reason to be nervous about it. You are merely more aware of the reality of your financial situation, which is a very good thing. The more accurate you are about where you stand now, the better prepared you are to get to where you need to be. So if you are feeling more thrifty or conservative than you usually do, this isn't a panic-based reaction to a shortage of funds. But listen to your gut.

sooo listening to my gut is supposed to keep me on the financial up & up? I think part of my gut got me into this problem (cupcakes, anyone? $58.00 tea's? swarkovski jewels) to name a few things...

anywho...

I am on the budget friendly- svelt friendly kind of mood, therefore I am eating oatmeal in the mornings and benefiting 2 ways- looser pants (yay!) and not spending upwards of $7.00 a day on breakfast (yay! Yay!) however the whole point to this experiment of thrifiness is to pocket said $- to which I have not because I cannot seem to figure out where it goes... and it goes and it goes....

today...is 9/11/12.

several thoughts occur to me on this day,

and every 9/11 that passes.

there are too many thoughts to write down,

too many thoughts to try to forget...

too many thoughts to leave unsaid

because to say them NOW would be...

useless.

My thougths will remain inside,

simply put..

I will never forget...

particularly because of these thoughts

that's all...

Wow...



why am I off to the side? forshadowing...



family times...

80's for sure.

pink and yellow do match (in this world)

love surrounds.

poem of the day

Longing

I think that describes how this is going…

I seem to be in a constant state

Of longing for you

To think I thought this was ok

I thought this was a way to live

Just survive with the “remnants of love”

With bits and pieces

Traces in spaces

That were not meant for me.

Surely you think I jest,

Performing for pittance

Like a clown,

My makeup hides my

Frown, I laugh

At no joke

But heavens no,

It is not…funny

Shame

That is another word

For being in love with you

coffee thought...

What is it about my face that allows folks to spill their soul to me?
What makes me the secret keeper?
It is not new - it is something that I have always know
something that has been my fate for a long while now
and it is something that is good with bad tendencies.

think about it...

that's all...

coffee thought...

coffee thought...

Desiring a full bodied cup of Joe.
On the train getting into work.
Today was supposed to be a good day.
Better than yesterday and almost as good as tomorrow.
But I forgot my lunch and the spare box of oatmeal in my house so there is that.
Also, today is day 2 of school.
We shall see how that masses fare there.
So this leaves me needing a fuller cup of coffee to overcome the
Wednesday but it feels like Monday blues.
that's all...


Sent from my iPhone

coffee thought...

coffee thought...

Tuesday feeling like a Monday. It is the first day of classes for my school.
What I love about the "first day of"...
Is that it is ripe with numerous possibilities and hope that no one can deny and the anticipation of what is to come.
Sometimes anxious
Something fearful.
Something amazing.
That is my outlook.
Change
Fall leaves
Turing colors hoping to be admired in their everyday life- I mean it is normal to change to a vibrant reddish gold, just to fall off and be swept away?
Seasons getting brisker.
 Jackets getting buttoned up.
Life moving right along.
that's all. ..