some words...

This journey is not by yourself

coffee thought...

Life is fragile.
Cherish the moments you have because you never know what will be your last.
And just because it is your last does that mean I absolve you of all the misdeeds you have done? Do I be the bigger person and let that go? Am I to ignore the hurt that was caused and just let bygones be bygones? Because you are bye and gone?
I don't know
Hurt people hurt people
Pain is inevitable
Choose

that's all...
r.i.p. Mr. Smith.

coffee thought...

coffee thought...

It amazes me that even tho the NYC MTA trains 

go one direction per track 

(like uptown is going up) 

and they ain't making no left turns 

or right turn down the tracks- 

WHY IS THERE ALWAYS TRAIN TRAFFIC AHEAD?

Like WTF we are going one way? 

That is not traffic that is a blatant lie

And you are voting to raise the fares to $3.00 per ride? 

Like dude - really? 

This is what I pay for?

I remember the days 

when a ride was $1.25 

and folks were complaining 

it was going up to $1.50 

and the service still sucked. 

The trains still went in the one direction on the tracks 

and there was still train traffic ahead. 

So riddle me this

What am I doing?

that's all...

today...

After today, that is the truth. 

What I do know is that

God is good

All the time 

and 

All the time 

God is good. 

Horoscope: Gemini: January 22nd, 2017

It's a great day to enjoy the quiet comforts of home and family in a preferably soft and harmonious setting. It's a great time to reflect over the achievements and challenges you've recently faced and strongly focus on how you'll make further advances in the future.

Hmmm somethings to think about...

coffee thought...

A few things.

First I do not owe you shit.

Let's get that clear.

It takes two people to be in this friendship 

and when one person consistently feels they are 

'doing all the work' 

and wakes the hell up and

 CHOOSES 

not to anymore - 

please do not get your damn ass panties in a bunch 

because this is the way it is.

 It's called life and free will and choice

Rant over. So where did that come from?

I had the pleasant opportunity to have a text message conversation with someone whom I called a friend - hell even sister at one point this past weekend and she got upset that our friendship isn't the same and attributes that to Me choosing others over her. I simply explained that as I evaluated the past 2-3 immediate years of this friendship I recognized where the reciprocity was present. 
Simply put- how has she shown up in my life. 
Has she attended any of my functions- like a housewarming or anything?
No. 
Has she made time to celebrate my birthday at any time (let alone the surprise birthday party that was thrown for me)- nope. And let's be clear- I get that maybe a set time/ date may conflict with many of other life plans out there- it happens - but my birthday happened with not so much as a " hey let's get together this random day to acknowledge you". 
Nope. That would never cross their mind. Yet I made it a point to be there for many of her birthdays in different states nonetheless. I traveled across 5 states when the third child was born. I was there for the beginning, middle and witnessed the demise of the 1st marriage and the beginnings and thru the current marriage. 
Yet because she chooses to view the few pics of IG of my life and create her own story (fascinating I tell you) about whom I choose to spend my time with and call out specific people- it seems to me that because maybe you are lacking somewhere (in your life perhaps? In my life- yup because you are not In my pictures perhaps? ) that there is this ...: angst? Jealousy? Over concern about the wrong things- like how about you think about why I pulled away and your contributions to that.

Let's be perfectly clear- because I had to ask you for money that was owed you said I made a federal case- uh no. I asked a year later for money that was owed- hardly a federal case. I traveled up and down the east coast and across several state lines for many a kids birth/ birthday party/ your mothers party and because I am not part of your mommy club or second wives club or whatever and I am an afterthought? Well I'm saving you the time it takes to after- think about me and removing myself from the equation.

Choices

I choose to spend time with friends that listen to me check up on me and show up for me. I gladly and willingly do the same for them no questions asked. I have and used to do that for her. I got wise and checked the interactions and see the feeling was not mutual and I fell back. 
It's life- not rocket science.

Eh. Some people are in your life for a reason, a season, a lifetime, but most of all a lesson. I have learned many a lesson- specifically do not expect people to care as much as I do because not everyone will- and hell not everyone was raised like me. 
Thank you for that. 
As I mentioned... I wish no harm or illness on her and her family- just my time will be spent elsewhere.
Deuces.

Here's a Bible passage I'd like to share with you...

"Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:"

‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭5:6‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Gemini horoscope for Jan 16 2017 (coffee thought...)

coffee thought...

Sometimes when you look really hard for something, you don't find it even if it's in plain sight. That's because - at that moment when we're in a panicked search - that thing we're searching for seems so elusive and so important that we think it will be impossible to find, or it will be in some unreachable place. You are looking for something now, Gemini. You are looking hard. Perhaps you've been looking for quite some time. But it is out there. You just need to relax - and instead of searching - beckon it to come to you.

look

just relax

look

just breathe

look

just be

coffee thought...

Coffee thought...

Left work at 10:30 this evening.
There is always work to be done and more to do. Fun time in the OFA world when you are switching teams and all of the responsibilities that goes with it. Or that you asked for it. And it was sold to you in a crack pipe of accolades and praise.
Eh.
Maybe tomorrow.
that's all...

Oh side note:
Watched President Obama give his farewell speech today. This signifies an end of an era and truly a historic time in this Nation that had promise and growth and challenge and successes. Now... here are the real obstacles with the current elected person to our office. It is not at all anything funny and pretty messed up to see what human beings voted to run what was/ is the 'greatest nation' around. Right now- we are beyond the laughing stock of this world and something that is truly not funny.
We shall see how HOW we all survive this next 4 years- like I was telling a fellow #nobehaviorcrew member that is is like High school or college where you may hate hate hate it but you got 4 years here and have to stick it out. That is what we gonna have to do. Hardcore. Everyday. Strive for better. Never make the same mistake. Change the system. Break the broken system. Fight for social justice and make our voices heard. Yes, by any means necessary. By all means necessary.
As Mr. President Barack Obama said
Yes we can
Yes we did

Ok that's all...

coffee thought ...

coffee thought ...

☕️

Today is the day. Pretty much I have an appointment at 11:30 to figure out some things about 'the girls' and while I am trying to be brave I am also a bit scared. It is something to get to this point in life and then to have this scare. Which is what it is a scare. I am not claiming I have anything just scared of something.

that's all..

18 of them not bad..

Put "Yes" by the states you have been to...

The average is 8 for Americans. 

How do you match up?... not too bad

Alabama-

Alaska  

Arizona -

Arkansas 

California- yes

Colorado 

Connecticut - yes

Delaware - yes

Florida--yes

Georgia- yes

Hawaii  

Idaho  

Illinois -

Indiana-

Iowa  

Kansas -

Kentucky -

Louisiana - yes

Maine -

Maryland - yes

Massachusetts- yes

Michigan - 

Minnesota-

Mississippi--  

Missouri - 

Montana

Nebraska  

Nevada - yes  

New Hampshire -

New Jersey - yes

New Mexico -  

New York- yes

North Carolina - yes

North Dakota  

Ohio -

Oklahoma

Oregon  

Pennsylvania - yes

Rhode Island- yes

South Carolina- yes

South Dakota  

Tennessee - 

Texas-

Utah 

Vermont-

Virginia - yes

Washington State - 

Washington DC - yes

West Virginia - yes

Wisconsin - 

Wyoming

18 of them- not bad. 

I am almost semi well traveled

 (well not really...

 and not at all in them mid or red states because... 

well look at who is going to follow up 

President Barack Obama).

Time to fire up the airplane miles...

sometimes....

Sometimes 

you need the wisdom 

of someone elses mother 

to tell you the things 

that you kinda already know 

but needed to hear out loud anyway. 

Thanks Mom.. 

I still hear you. 

that's all..

coffee thought...

coffee thought...

Today being the 4th day of the year I decided to rise and shine earlier than normal in an effort to be healthy - working on the wealthy and wise parts but still. I didn't make it to the gym this am because tiredness creeps in and seeps thru your body at the most inconsistent times.
I hop the shower and dress and get to the train by 7 am. Miracle that it is I am moving right along to be at work before 8:20am. Well- as I sat between borough hall and ___ street for 25 minutes my kind immediately went to what the hell is going on and I hope everyone is alright.
A train jumped the stopping blocks and derailed. Over 100 people hurt- hopefully none life threatening.
It is always something in NY.
Pray for them.

that's all...