So I decided to try again.
On this day I thought having survived the first day I would be well equipped to handle the heat, sweat and tears (no blood? not yet) and breathing of the 2nd class of Bikram yoga. Apparently not as nausea set in immediately and my 'calm/ serene' thought process escaped me definitely immediately.
I was breathing
I was remembering to focus
I was sweating profusely
I was not flexible
I was getting a cramp in my foot
I need to sit down
I need to focus
I need to stop
I need to remember to keep breathing
I was a hot mess - literally by the end of the class and think that maybe this is not the focus and thought process I can get used to.
Maybe this is not the exercise and path I am supposed to take.
maybe I am not the person who will be able to balance on one foot in a standing bow pose.
or ever be able to touch my toes again
or ever be able to achieve balance in my life- literally and figuratively.
Maybe I just need to focus on myself in other ways - trying to listen to my body is not working.
Hell, we haven't had a cohesive working relationship in some time, it seems. She gets me to where I need to be, I tend to think, OK next time I will do such-and-such to make it all better. Even the whole take care of yourself thing- I literally fell down steps and didn't take care of myself immediately because of the responsibility I think I have to other people, places, and things before me.
damn
I need a re-set button.
and a refill.
Showing posts with label yoga. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yoga. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 08, 2013
Tuesday, May 07, 2013
Day 1- Bikram Yoga
Ya dead yet
Yeah mon- Cool Runnings circa 1993
Yoga
Day one- everyone must start somewhere. This is where it begins. I can't tell you how excited and nervous I was to attempt to begin Bikram Yoga on Monday. Sparkles decided it would be a good thing to gift me for my upcoming birthday (instead of anything truly sparkly like Swarvoski). I read the rules, registered for the class, drank more water than I thought I could (which is not up to my recommended 8 cups still) and then promptly spent $108.00 on the following items: a yoga mat, yoga like pants, a tee shirt, a yoga towel, and a bag to carry yoga mat in. Yes. I had now invested money into this venture so I *thought* I will be all in. The name of the place is Bikram Yoga Lower East Side. I walked from the job (figured a bit of walking would be good) and showed up. This place was packed. Literally. Instructions- take off shoes. Check. Be ready to sweat. Double check. Stay hydrated. 1/2 a check. So I tell the nice man at the front desk this is my first time and he says, "Oh excellent, Welcome. So your main goal is to stay in the room..." Really? Is it that bad I think and apparently verbalise. "Really, it is not that bad. If you need to sit down then do it. It happens. Listen to your body - take care of yourself. Have fun." Sounds easy enough- not that I think this will be easy at all. "Oh and stay in the back of the room- it is cooler back there.." Sane parting words
So, I prepare to go in and place my mat. Not trying to be too close and not trying to be antisocial. Now what? Cause I am sweating already and I ain't even do nothing. Oh. Got to remember to breathe...which is such a lesson in life as it is
...Corine the instructor comes in, asks for new persons and checks our placement (yes, back of the room). She does not demonstrate the poses, but we should look at the first row for an example. Ok they are all professional and stuff. (Makes me sick). And we begin.
Breathing, stretching, sweating (not in that order because sweating began before I even attempted something). Somewhere in the 90 minute class I know when I was supposed to be all serene and focused and meditative, I was cursing everyone and their momma. I was especially cursing my body and the lack of stretch I have. I was cursing the weight I am carrying and the rolls that I am rolling with.
not a peaceful/ graceful look happening here.
And I would just like to say that if the back of the room was "cooler" than the front of the room, then the front of the room must have been straight HELL as the back of the room was hot-as-hell.
As I left the place I felt nausea, wet, sweaty, sick, like I was going to throw up, dizzy, grimey, hurt, tired, ashamed.
and I had the best sleep of my life.
Considering I only had one outfit I definitely needed a rest day in between,
SO that was day 1. My motto...try everything at least 2-3 times to be very sure I do or don't like it.
we shall see.
prayers are welcome.
Namaste.
Yeah mon- Cool Runnings circa 1993
Yoga
Day one- everyone must start somewhere. This is where it begins. I can't tell you how excited and nervous I was to attempt to begin Bikram Yoga on Monday. Sparkles decided it would be a good thing to gift me for my upcoming birthday (instead of anything truly sparkly like Swarvoski). I read the rules, registered for the class, drank more water than I thought I could (which is not up to my recommended 8 cups still) and then promptly spent $108.00 on the following items: a yoga mat, yoga like pants, a tee shirt, a yoga towel, and a bag to carry yoga mat in. Yes. I had now invested money into this venture so I *thought* I will be all in. The name of the place is Bikram Yoga Lower East Side. I walked from the job (figured a bit of walking would be good) and showed up. This place was packed. Literally. Instructions- take off shoes. Check. Be ready to sweat. Double check. Stay hydrated. 1/2 a check. So I tell the nice man at the front desk this is my first time and he says, "Oh excellent, Welcome. So your main goal is to stay in the room..." Really? Is it that bad I think and apparently verbalise. "Really, it is not that bad. If you need to sit down then do it. It happens. Listen to your body - take care of yourself. Have fun." Sounds easy enough- not that I think this will be easy at all. "Oh and stay in the back of the room- it is cooler back there.." Sane parting words
So, I prepare to go in and place my mat. Not trying to be too close and not trying to be antisocial. Now what? Cause I am sweating already and I ain't even do nothing. Oh. Got to remember to breathe...which is such a lesson in life as it is
...Corine the instructor comes in, asks for new persons and checks our placement (yes, back of the room). She does not demonstrate the poses, but we should look at the first row for an example. Ok they are all professional and stuff. (Makes me sick). And we begin.
Breathing, stretching, sweating (not in that order because sweating began before I even attempted something). Somewhere in the 90 minute class I know when I was supposed to be all serene and focused and meditative, I was cursing everyone and their momma. I was especially cursing my body and the lack of stretch I have. I was cursing the weight I am carrying and the rolls that I am rolling with.
not a peaceful/ graceful look happening here.
And I would just like to say that if the back of the room was "cooler" than the front of the room, then the front of the room must have been straight HELL as the back of the room was hot-as-hell.
As I left the place I felt nausea, wet, sweaty, sick, like I was going to throw up, dizzy, grimey, hurt, tired, ashamed.
and I had the best sleep of my life.
Considering I only had one outfit I definitely needed a rest day in between,
SO that was day 1. My motto...try everything at least 2-3 times to be very sure I do or don't like it.
we shall see.
prayers are welcome.
Namaste.
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